Shop. Spend. Entertain. Eat out. Open presents. Repeat. Somehow our society has transformed the holiday season into two to three months of overindulgences.
What happens to kids whose families can’t afford the excesses of the holidays? For many high school students, the season can illicit feelings of inadequacy, insecurity and unfulfilled expectations. Whether it’s the pressure of gift-giving, or a comparison to those who have families to celebrate with or the means to attend pricy seasonal events, the holidays can be especially difficult for any teenager, especially those facing socioeconomic challenges.
We try to view the holidays as an opportunity to help teens reframe the season’s focus from material things to thanks, empathy and appreciation.
“High school students who are overcoming personal and environmental obstacles behind the scenes, face an even larger burden during the holidays,” said Gina Nicola, community partner for student mentorship at Flex Hig. “Yet, through mindfulness, education and compassion, we can help them discover a healthier perspective on what this season can truly offer.”
Here are some strategies parents, guardians and friends can use to help their teens feel fulfilled during the holidays, regardless of what’s wrapped up with a bow:
Focus on Experiences vs. Things – Instead of allowing the season to revolve around presents, reflect and emphasize the value of experiences. Perhaps introduce traditions, like viewing holiday decorations in the neighborhood, baking cookies together or volunteering as a group, these moments will create memories and sustainable feelings, extending beyond any material gift.
Start a Gratitude Practice – Encourage your teen to start a daily gratitude journal during the holidays. Each day, ask them to write down three things they’re thankful for, why they are grateful and how it makes them feel. Writing (not typing) responses to these questions takes gratitude to a deeper level. Gratitude isn’t about ignoring hardships; it’s about acknowledging that even in difficult times, there are many aspects of life to appreciate.
Model Empathy Through Giving Back – The holidays are a perfect time to teach children the importance of giving back. Helping others shifts the spotlight onto serving their needs and leaves the giver with an impression of increased worth. Organize a volunteer activity, whether it’s serving at a local shelter or donating gifts to families or senior citizens in need.
Emphasize the Value of Relationships – Remind teens that while gifts can be fun, the relationships they have with friends and family are what truly matter. If gifts are involved, consider putting a limit on the amount, say $5 or $10. This will enhance fun and creativity instead of trying to impress with gifts. Sometimes the best gifts are those made by the giver. Encourage meaningful conversations and shared experiences over the holiday break.
Create Traditions that Reflect Your Values – Start traditions that emphasize kindness, community and self-reflection. Whether it’s writing gratitude notes for those people in your life that you count on, thank-you notes for gifts received, or reflecting on the year’s life lessons and areas of growth, these traditions teach your teen that the holidays are more than just an opportunity for material gain – they’re a time for personal reflection and collective growth.